Newsletter

1. ENGINE TEMPERATURE WARNING LIGHT

What it looks like: A pirate ship with its sails down as if to say, "I'm just a normal boat, no pirates here."

What it means: Your engine is too hot, friend. Here is a useful guide for what to do if your engine overheats.

2. TIRE PRESSURE WARNING LIGHT

What it looks like: A Buckingham Palace guard telling you the field goal is GOOD!

What it means: The pressure in one or more of your tires is too low and needs to be attended to.

3. OIL PRESSURE WARNING

What it looks like: You're about to get three wishes.

What it means: Your engine is running low on oil, or there is a problem with your car's oil pressure system.

4. TRACTION CONTROL

What it looks like: Cthulhu wearing a fedora.

What it means: The car's traction control system is engaged.

5. ENGINE WARNING

What it looks like: Yellow submarine, a yellow submarine, a yellow submarine.

What it means: It can blink on for a number of reasons. Read about some of those here.

6. ANTILOCK BRAKE WARNING

What it looks like: The cover of a fitness magazine.

What it means: There is an issue with your anti-lock brake system that needs to be diagnosed and fixed.

7. AUTOMATIC SHIFT LOCK OR ENGINE START INDICATOR

What it looks like: The bat signal, if Bruce Wayne had been traumatized in a shoe closet instead of a bat cave as a child.

What it means: You need to engage the brake, either to start your car's ignition or to get it out of neutral.

8. BATTERY ALERT

What it looks like: Math lego.

What it means: The car's charging system is short of power. You are running solely on battery.

9. FUEL INDICATOR SYMBOL

What it looks like: A snake-infested ATM.

What it means: You are running low on fuel. Fun fact: The symbol on the fuel gauge also has an arrow next to it—this indicates which side of the car has the gas cap. No more gas station three-point turns in rental cars ever again.

10. SEATBELT REMINDER LIGHT

What it looks like: James Carville wearing a bandolier.

What it means: Buckle your seatbelt, please.

11. AIRBAG INDICATOR

What it looks like: A man wearing a tie, shaking his fist at you as he falls down. Why did you push him?

What it means: There may be an issue with one or more of your car's airbags, or the airbag system in general.

12. FOG LAMP INDICATOR

What it looks like: A jellyfish leaping through a waterfall.

What it means: Your fog lights are on.

13. SECURITY LIGHT

What it looks like: They put a boot on your car and your car is also covered in icicles. This has been the worst winter ever.

What it means: You may need a key with the proper transponder in order to trigger the ignition. Or, there is something else wrong with your car's anti-theft system.

14. TRACTION CONTROL MALFUNCTION

What it looks like: Pyramid on the dollar bill...or is that what the Illuminati wants you to think it looks like???????????

What it means: There is an issue with your anti-skid system, and it may be shut off completely.

15. WASHER FLUID INDICATOR

What it looks like: A conductor's point of view, tapping her music stand and preparing to lead an orchestra consisting of two candy canes that are stuck together.

What it means: The washer fluid level is low. Please fill that up when you get a chance.

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